Scoundrel of the Month: The baptist chruch
The baptist church uses death as a recruiting tool. It disguists me.
I recently attended a funeral in the southern US. It's about the third one I've been to. I've noticed a disgusting trend with how the baptists lay the dead to rest. About mid way into the funeral the preacher turns the event into a recruitment session.
I suppose it's been a good 20 years now since I've been an atheist. Our society makes it sound like such a loaded word. It simply means that I don't believe in a god, I don't follow religion and I have the courage to admit it (unlike wishy-washy agnostics). Still there are rare times when we are all faced with religion such as a ceremony, funeral or wedding.
Most of the time I'm happy to refrain from lashing out against the church. I think the only other time I got this upset about religious influence was when Christian based blue laws denied me a bottle of wine for my mother on Mother's Day. Still, America is a country where we have the right to be completed mislead if we so desire.
Funerals are emotionally charged moments so we try our hardest to be respectful and stay quiet so the family can mourn their loss. I held my tongue then but now I'll lash out generically for the sake of closure.
After about an hour of visitation the preacher comes out and says a couple of opening words then there is some nice gospel music. At this point he starts with the whole routine of "this person is in heaven" and "this person is now out of pain" which brings the family comfort.
It doesn't take long for his voice to rise with authority and his tone quickly changes from, "Lets say goodbye to the person." to "YOUR GOING TO HELL IF YOU DIE AND DON'T HAVE JESUS!". He says it many different ways for the better part of an hour. It's remarkable how we're told over and over that we're not worthy; we have to accept Christ right now; it's the end of days; there is no time to waste! As the second hour started I began to forget I was at a funeral.
I started to taste a very strong bile on the side of my check after about 20 minutes of "Baptist Recruitment". It occurred to me at this point how I didn't know who this person was. The deceased was a distant relative so my presence was more of a show of support. Still, here this preacher is going on about hell and damnation and I realized that I'd like to know what kind of life the deceased lived. Nothing was mentioned about the person's career; their favorite tea; a turning moment in their life or what they accomplished.
About the only thing the preacher said about the deceased was that "they accepted the lord and 'THANK GOD' for that."
It was the most blatant and disgusting display of propaganda and fear mongering I've seen in a long time. With so many comfortable years as an atheist I was absolutely astonished that this persons' funeral had been hijacked and the audience was jumping right in. A man in front of us yelled out "Keep going preacher man!". It took every bit of restraint and respect I could muster to keep from springing out of my pew and screaming, "You lying sack of shit! Why do you propagate these lies?".
I told my wife that during my funeral I don't want a filthy preacher anywhere near my body. I quickly thought out the kind of ceremony I want. You can burn my body up and then pour it over a huge copper bowl of fresh earth. Somebody can speak about how "The earth gave me life" and now "I'll give my life back to the earth. You damn sure better tell an anecdote about my life; my career and what I accomplished. And then when it's over I expect you to let go.
My funeral will be a small ceremony to remember me; to give my family closure and then I'll be food for worms. There is nothing more.